Paperwork Pregnancy continues...

Well, our home study agency is closing it's doors. We really wanted to be able to keep our social worker, so we finally found an agency who would sign her on as a contract worker for us. So we are making the move to AAA (All About Adoption) for to be our home study agency. And once again everything needs to be updated and kept current. So here we go again. Dr. visits. Fingerprints. Social worker visits. Etc..
  We just found out that a French couple on a Colombia group I am a member of has been on the ICBF wait list since October 2008 for 2 siblings under 5. They have 15 families ahead of them at this time. That is the same category we are in. I'd like to not say this out loud and be in a bit of denial about it, but it's true. I asked our agency today "Will we wait 4-5 yrs for referral?" She said things are always speeding up and slowing down, but that 4 yrs was a reasonable number. When we started with Colombia I was 6 months and O not quite 2. We were told 6 months for approval and 3 yrs for referral, which was fine by us. Well, 19 mo later we were finally approved and by now wait times are up to 4-5 yrs. Yikes. We followed our hearts to Colombia and if we moved on we would leave a part of our heart forever there. Why? Why are our hearts caught so tight up in those tropical mountains? I don't know, but they definitely are. And maybe, just maybe it's because our children are there somewhere??? Lord, lead us to them and make it be sooner than 4-5 yrs from now, pleeeease.

Colombia map

Our children are here! (Unless God changes plans for us! :)

OFFICIAL APPROVAL from ICBF!

I have seen it with my EYES! It's true! We have waited 19 months for this! Oh, I know we have a loooong journey ahead of us, but we are so excited to finally be approved by Colombia! The approval wording states that we are approved to adopt 2 children boys/girls 0 - 4 yrs and 11 months. It is hard on me that our children could be born. Are they ok? Thankfully we can pray and pray we do. We can trust them into the loving arms of our Father, but it's hard. I want them in my arms! :) And we've only begun....................................we have years ahead of us................(and today I am not so thankful for Play Dough as I just spent 30 minutes digging Play Dough out of the toaster :)

COLOMBIA APPROVAL!

Truly friends, like music on our ears, we received our Colombia approval! We were approved November 18, 2012. Just found out this week. I know we still have a long journey ahead, but today I'm jumping for joy! We have not received our official letter yet. Like Thomas, I want to see it with my eyes! :) If nothing changes (LOL), we have approximately a 3 year wait ahead of us. Now that we are officially on the waiting list, waiting doesn't seem in vain. In the meantime we will keep our eyes open to other options, but at least Colombia will steadily be getting closer. And really, if we would get 2 toddlers in 3 yrs, Oliver and Isabel would be 6 and 5, our hands would be full once again! I guess we'll see how the doors swing open.
  Today I'm thanking the Lord for PlayDough. It has been getting to -30* F at night and warming up if we're lucky to 0 during the day. Very cold. My children have been bouncing off the walls with cabin fever, but today I made them PlayDough and they played with it for hours with their match box toy cars and trucks!

Is it enough?

Well, the doors closed for us for the little girl and the little boy with special needs whom we inquired about. Tonight I've been feeling full of questions. Am I doing enough to reach out? Am I giving enough smiles? Am I lightening enough loads? Am I doing enough to soothe where I can in this world full of hurt? I just feel so helpless. Is it enough? I believe those in the adoption world have their eyes more opened to the hurt around them. Once again my prayer is: Lord, make me a servant. Lord, make me like You. For You are a servant, make me one too. Merry Christmas!

A beautiful day

Marv's hunting. Children sleeping. I just got in from playing with the horses. What a beautiful day in Colorado!
        The sun is in my eyes,
        The blue is in my skies,
        The mountains are a laughin', a laughin' back at me
Yes, it's a good day, done the Colorado way
Yes, it's a good day, a farmer girl's dream
Yes, it's a good day, I love everything.
         The harvest put away,
         I'm turnin' up the clay
         The air is gettin' nippy
         And the trees are turnin' gray
Yes, it's a good day....
 Well, the lil 2 yr old with special needs whom we inquired about has found another family. I am glad I kept my hopes low and I am glad she has found a home. She needed one, dear baby. We inquired about another little boy and little girl both with special needs this week, however there are several people ahead of us on these little tykes as well. We should get an update on them next week. We are not in a hurry, however wait times for Colombia are getting longer and longer for a healthy child under 4. It feels very closed minded and selfish to just stay stuck in our rut and say "We are going to wait 4 yrs for a healthy child from Colombia." Maybe God has something else in mind for us? We must be open minded and we are. We are keeping our eyes and ears open and whatever falls into place will be. So that is why we are inquiring about these different special need children. For some reason we feel led that way, to pursue all options and then let God open or close the doors. How could you adopt without Faith in our Father? I am so thankful I can say, "Here, Lord Jesus, please take care of this for us." And then...trust.

Crazy? Maybe.

"I'm lonesome for my precious children. They 

 live so far away. Oh, may they hear my

                         callin' and come back home someday.
        ...I brave life's storm, defy the tempest, to bring 
                   them home from anywhere..."  
That is a beautiful song and it feels so true right now. Where are our children? And then...WHY do I wonder? I have a 3 yr. old bouncing boy and a 2 yr. old sunshiny girl, a wonderful husband, 4 horses, 1 mule, 5 dogs, 3 puppies, 2 cats! Why is my heart yearning for my children who are not home yet? Crazy? Yes. But it's me, so I guess God made me crazy. I question my sanity, because I know so many people would be perfectly content with a controlled, 2 children, life. A boy and a girl 14 months apart. How perfect! Especially when red tape makes adoption so daunting. Me? As soon as life starts getting too controlled and our youngest reaches 2 it's time for more little ones! And dear husband is right there with me, tho, of course more realistic and unemotional :). And so I travel the world via Rainbow Kids and Reece's Rainbow  and many other waiting children websites in search of the next leaf for our tree. So many children needing so many homes. The need is overwhelming. Once again, I remember Mother Teresa's words, "If you can't feed one hundred people, feed one." "Lord, make me a servant. Lord, make me like you. For you are a servant, make me one too." Open our eyes, help us see You and for the trillionth time Lord, please guide us to our family.